#most of these sketches are like 10 mins

[kinerxy]

wip

[kourota]

i had to

[mystery-star]

Drawings - Day 5

No I haven't forgotten Ben!

considering he was really just a quick sketch I love it.

[glowettee]

✧˖° studying without suffering: how to actually enjoy learning (yes, it’s possible)

✧˖° let’s talk.

hey angels, it's mindy!

most people treat studying like a punishment. something to be endured, not enjoyed. it’s that thing you force yourself to do, like taking bitter medicine or running a mile in gym class. but what if that’s the reason you struggle with it?

the secret? you were never meant to hate learning.

somewhere along the way, school made it boring. maybe you had teachers who sucked the fun out of it. maybe you associate studying with stress, deadlines, and exhaustion. but learning is supposed to be exciting. when you actually enjoy it, everything changes. you focus longer, retain more, and (ironically) spend less time studying because your brain actually absorbs the information.

so, let’s fix it. let’s make studying something you want to do instead of something you suffer through.

✧˖° ➼ step 1: detach learning from school

(school & learning are not the same thing. stop letting school ruin your curiosity.)

the first mindset shift? realize that school does not own learning.

➼ school is about structure, deadlines, and tests. it’s designed to measure performance. ➼ learning is about curiosity, deep thinking, and exploration. it’s designed to expand your mind. and help you grow as a person.

if you’ve only ever studied because you had to, your brain associates it with pressure. break that pattern. find something outside of school that you actually like learning about. philosophy, psychology, art history, neuroscience, fashion design, whatever makes you curious.

even if it’s unrelated to your classes, it rewires your brain to see learning as an intrinsic activity, not just an obligation. once you enjoy learning in general, you can transfer that energy back into your studies.

✧˖° ➼ step 2: romanticize the process (but actually make it feel good)

("romanticizing studying" doesn’t mean just buying cute stationery. let’s go deeper.)

sensory association is everything. your brain links experiences to the way they feel physically. so if studying feels uncomfortable, you’ll avoid it. the solution? make it a luxurious experience for your senses.

✧ visuals → clean, minimalist desk, soft lighting, aesthetic study materials ✧ sound → rain sounds, classical piano, lo-fi beats (music that enhances focus) ✧ touch → cozy blankets, warm tea, smooth pens gliding over paper ✧ scent → vanilla candles, fresh coffee, the pages of an old book

this isn’t just about aesthetics. it’s neuroscience. when studying feels pleasurable, your brain stops resisting it.

✧˖° ➼ step 3: use high-dopamine study techniques

(forcing yourself to study the “normal” way is why you hate it.)

some study methods are literally designed to be boring. ditch them.

instead, try:

➼ blurting method: instead of passively reading, close your book and write down everything you remember. then check what you missed. (way more engaging than just re-reading notes.) ➼ dual-coding: mix visuals with text. draw tiny sketches next to your notes. turn concepts into mind maps. watch a video explaining a topic right after reading about it. ➼ pomodoro stacking: instead of the typical 25-minute study sprints, customize it. (ex: 50 min deep focus + 10 min break with an actual reward.) ➼ interleaving technique: mix subjects instead of block studying. it forces your brain to stay engaged.

stop making studying harder than it needs to be. find what works for you, and your brain will stop fighting it.

✧˖° ➼ step 4: make studying social (but in a smart way)

(because you’re not supposed to do this alone.)

studying alone for hours? miserable. but studying with others who are just as serious as you? instant motivation boost.

but instead of chaotic group study sessions where no one gets anything done, try:

✧ parallel studying: hop on facetime or join a study livestream. silent, focused, but together. ✧ teaching method: explain concepts to a friend. if you can teach it, you truly understand it. ✧ study accountability: check in with someone daily. send each other your study goals, no excuses.

even just knowing someone else is studying at the same time can trick your brain into feeling more engaged.

✧˖° ➼ step 5: shift your identity

("i hate studying" isn’t a personality trait. it’s a mindset problem.)

if you keep saying “i hate studying,” your brain will never enjoy it. change the narrative.

➼ instead of “i suck at studying,” try → “i’m learning how to study in a way that works for me.” ➼ instead of “i can’t focus,” try → “i’m training my brain to focus longer every day.” ➼ instead of “i don’t feel like it,” try → “i’m someone who gets things done, whether i feel like it or not.”

become the type of person who enjoys learning. once that becomes your identity, everything else follows.

✧˖° ➼ step 6: create emotional attachment to your goals

motivation dies when your goals feel distant and impersonal. if you’re studying just because you “have to,” it’s easy to procrastinate. but if you link it to something deeply personal, it becomes non-negotiable.

try this: visualize your future self. imagine the version of you who already achieved everything you want. who is she? what does she do? how does she study?

then, make it emotional. ✧ if you dream of getting into your dream school, print pictures of it. make a vision board. ✧ if you want financial freedom, imagine the luxury of never stressing over money. ✧ if you want to be respected in your field, remind yourself that your knowledge is your power.

when you make studying personal, it stops being a chore. it becomes a commitment.

✧˖° ➼ step 7: stop making everything harder than it needs to be

(struggling doesn’t mean you’re working harder. it just means you’re struggling.)

too many people study inefficiently because they think suffering = productivity. but studying smarter is always better than studying longer.

some ways to make it easier on yourself: ➼ use study apps → quizlet, pomdoro apps for focus, notion for organization ➼ summarize like you’re texting a friend → rewrite notes in your own words, no unnecessary fluff ➼ study in “levels” → don’t jump straight into deep studying. warm up with light review, then increase intensity ➼ take advantage of spaced repetition → stop cramming, your brain retains more when you review over time

efficiency = less stress, better results. don’t work harder than necessary.

✧˖° ➼ step 8: replace toxic productivity with high-performance habits

studying 10 hours in one night ≠ academic excellence. true high-achievers prioritize sustainability.

➼ quit glorifying exhaustion. taking breaks improves focus. it’s not laziness. ➼ learn when to walk away. if you’re zoning out, step away. 10 minutes of real focus > 2 hours of fake studying. ➼ protect your sleep. all-nighters don’t make you hardcore, they make you ineffective. your brain processes info while you sleep.

the goal isn’t to study the longest. it’s to study in a way that keeps your mind sharp and focused.

✧˖° ➼ step 9: master the “dopamine pull” method

instead of forcing motivation, use dopamine to your advantage.

➼ habit stacking → pair studying with something enjoyable (ex: study while drinking your favorite matcha) ➼ mini rewards → after finishing a chapter, reward yourself with something small but satisfying ➼ gamification → track progress like a video game. every completed task = a “level up”

your brain loves dopamine. give it reasons to associate studying with good feelings.

✧˖° ➼ step 10: let go of perfectionism (but keep high standards)

perfectionism leads to procrastination and burnout. instead of striving for flawless, aim for consistent excellence.

✧ done is better than perfect. stop rewriting notes 5 times. ✧ progress is the goal. each study session should move you forward, even if it’s small. ✧ your worth is not your grades. strive for success, but don’t let school define you.

when you release perfectionism, you actually start achieving more. keep your standards high, but don’t let them paralyze you.

✧˖° mindy’s personal tips

(things that helped me romanticize studying & actually make it enjoyable:)

➼ set a 5-minute timer. just start. most of the time, your brain stops resisting once you begin. ➼ don’t let study guilt ruin your breaks. rest is productive. ➼ have a “study fit.” i swear, dressing up just a little makes a difference. ➼ invest in one high-quality pen. something that glides effortlessly. small detail, huge difference. ➼ study in cafés, libraries, parks. switch locations to keep it interesting. ➼ make it ✧ cozy ✧. fuzzy socks, oversized sweaters, soft blankets. your comfort matters.

✧˖° homework: rewire your study experience

➼ for one of your study sessions this week, try at least two of the techniques above. ➼ write a short journal entry: how do you want to feel while studying? how can you make that happen? ➼ change just one thing about your study setup that makes it more enjoyable.

then come back & tell me. did studying feel better? (you can always message me or send me an ask in my inbox)

[vixellate]

What is Kato’s and Ivory’s relationship like?

Very close!! Even though they only met 3-5 years ago, as Ivory lived in Korea most of his life. But after losing his parents, Kato's family took him in, and because of shared "interests" (STALKING YOU) they clicked instantly. Can you tell I sketched this in like 10 mins--

[the-bloodline-embrace]

Should also be easier to write here. Unless you're done socializing for today, that's fair too.

"Oh... Oh dear. I... do not know quite how that feels on your end, but if you need anything for it, I am more than happy to provide. I'm... not a proper doctor, or anything, but... I have some cleaning materials and bandages that I carry with me."

"...I won't ask what happened with your eye, if that's any concern. You don't need to put everything on display to a man you just met, after all."

@yellow-rose-embalmer

Besides, even if you were a doctor, I doubt you could help me. As for my eye, well, it's quite simple. I could tell you about it as long as you don't, uh, want to lick it.

[goat-fanatic]

hihi not a creature au ask sorry but do u have any tips to improving art skills? /gen, second question how did u get into digital art?

dont be sorry the asks are for anything really

my biggest tip is pretty boring and has been said a billion times probably but you u fortunately need to do the boring basics. you can go anywhere you want from there and its gonna be much easier. ex. - drawing alot of boring 3d shapes in dofferent types of perspective. boom now you can draw backgrounds. drawing from models in realism  (live ones are better but photos are great too). boom now you have the skill and knowledge on how the human body works and can play around with it to develop ur own art style. greyscale form practice (like shading cubes or drapery or still life). boom u understand how light and shadow works. the hardest thing really (imo) is learning colour. me personally, traditional painting (acrylic, oil, guache, tempera) helped the most (again ALOT of still life). but learning colour theory, or just fucking around with whatever colour medium you like until it looks good is also very helpful. so again basics are really important.

next thing is, use resources. theres so many free  art resources out there and theyre very helpful. my personal fav lately are quickposes and david finch on youtube. use refs, if needed take ur own.

also mindset stuff like being okay with making "bad" drawings. shitty sketches, wierd colour xombinations, wonky perspective. making art is not abt not making mistakes, but abt making them and learning from them cuz if u dont try ull never get it right, even if its bad at first. also always go from overall to detail. make 5 minute sketches, that forces u to focus on form and translatinf the overall idea more than hyperfocusing on detail. and ofc alot of consistent practice. draw every day, whether its a 5 min aketch or something more polished. (im gonna attach some of my oractice sketches so u get the idea of what im talking abt cuz i feel like im not the best at explainin)

as for digital art, i was first drawing on a regular ass samsung tablet with a pen wrapped in tin foil (it makes it work like a stylus fun fact) on ibis paint which is free and honestly it was great. on thing is if ur starting digital get some free simple program cuz if u try to start with something thats "industry standard" its just making ur life harder cuz on top of learning how to draw oj a tablet, you have to learn the software, and u dont need that when u start. i got my actual drawing tablwt after like two years and i was working in krita (also free and really good). now i work in csp and its amazing but theres alot going on and it is pricey (but well  worth it imo) digital is easier in alot of ways but i still recommand learning traditionally

sorry for the shitty photo quality im bad at posting traditional art. but thats what im talking abt these are like 10-15 min each, focusing on form and the overall and not going into much detail

[2456788sworld]

DAILY CHECK-IN : Tue , 14 January 🫧🎀⋆౨ৎ ₊˚ 🦢・₊✧

⋆౨ৎ ₊˚ 🦢・₊✧⋆౨ৎ ₊˚ 🦢・₊✧⋆౨ৎ ₊˚ 🦢・₊✧⋆౨ৎ ₊˚

I'm always thriving in the things I love—learning new languages, exploring endless hobbies & just constantly growing .

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on how quickly time seems to pass & it's a reminder to make the most of every moment.With the winter vacation still here, I'm using this precious time to focus on 3 main goals before the new semester starts:

1. Chinese Learning: As I’ve already been learning Chinese, my goal is to speak and understand it fluently.

2. Comic Creation: (bringing my comic ideas to life )sketching and working on my comic

3. Yt : consistency

By focusing on these goals now, I’m building momentum and making significant progress. Once the university resumes, I’ll already have a solid routine in place, which will help me balance my studies and personal goals smoothly.

⋆౨ৎ ₊˚ 🦢・₊✧⋆౨ৎ ₊˚ 🦢・₊✧⋆౨ৎ ₊˚ 🦢・₊✧⋆౨ৎ ₊˚

" Time may feel like it’s slipping by, but it’s only a reminder to push forward "

⋆౨ৎ ₊˚ 🦢・₊✧⋆౨ৎ ₊˚ 🦢・₊✧⋆౨ৎ ₊˚ 🦢・₊✧⋆౨ৎ ₊˚

Today's Priorities: Let's get it done~

Chinese Learning : Learn 5–10 new chinese sentences , If I’ve got time, I’ll learn even more! Focusing on conversation videos and active recalling

Add more phrases to " phrases to embody in 2025 " journal

Comic Creation: Start sketching the ideas , aim to complete the first 5–6 pages today

Yt : Film 2 clips & edit

Take a refreshing shower

Take my Snoo for a walk around 5 pm

[ I’ll add more once I tick off a couple of things on my Today's priorities ]

Today's Wins ~

Completed filming + editing the clips

Took a refreshing shower

Learned Chinese for 20 mins

( I've come up with a brilliant idea -learning Chinese while doing house chores too , I’ll just pop on some audio, it’s the perfect way to use my time more efficiently, even while getting things done(allowing me to learn even while multi-tasking )˚˖𓍢ִ໋🍒✧˚.⋆

Completed adding the phrases to" phrases to embody in 2025" ( will add more later )

Brainstormed my comic story and characters, and tomorrow, I’m all set to start sketching them into reality!

[zabrak-show]

Palestine Fundraisers

I have held off doing something like this for far too long due to imposter syndrome and feeling like nothing i do is worth any monetary value, but i have nothing else to give. my husband has been unemployed since march and i'm barely making above min wage in 1 of the most expensive cities in the usa

i'm not saying any of this for you to feel bad for me, but just to give some context. I have been donating what little I can when I can to these campaigns. but i can't do it on my own.

So please, help me help these families. I have done my best to vet them as legit, but I'm not an expert and my process pretty much involves a few reverse google image searches and just talking to the folks involved. but use your own best judgment.

aid is not getting into gaza consistently or at all in some cases, israel has seen to that. these gofundmes are some of these families only chance right now. (still donate to orgs, it is still important, but rn these fundraisers are the most direct way to help)

so with all of that said, if you donate to any of these fundraisers and show me a screen shot, I will draw or write you something!

$10+ and I will sketch something for you in any of the fandoms I'm active in or if you just want like "flowers" or something

$20+ I will write you a ~1k fic of any fandom i'm in

$50+ I will send you some art and a personal note in the mail (this does require you to send me your mailing address)

I won't do anything for fandoms I'm not familiar with. I'm fine with any ship, but some characters I may not be as familiar with to write. (I'll let you know) I'm not really a porn artist yet but i can write smut. any other questions just let me know.

you can check out my ao3 for examples of my writing and fandoms i write for. my art can be found on here and on my side blog @zorak-show where all the non star wars related stuff goes.

even if only one or two of you does this it will mean the world to me and to the families you are helping it is literally life changing for them. thank you so much.

[avis-fictional-world]

Another 5 min challenge commission!! Thank you @doumadono for the commission! The gamble commissions are the most fun for me bc they have to be done so quickly!

If you are interested commission me here!

(Disclaimer I don’t time when I look up the references and when I look for markers and things like that. Plus I have to take a picture and clean up the lighting on the computer. It doesn’t take much to do all that part but don’t want to mislead the with the minor editing involved. In other words just drawing is counted.)

Commissions open!! 🙏☺️☺️

[somuchwatersoclosetohome]

stage/fright: the last weekend pt. 1 (aka the haunted matinee)

so it has been a week since the last weekend (hur hur) of stage/fright at the wyndham's... and what better way to reminisce than joining me for my last 2 recaps!! i really need to dredge up the memories for these yeesh

sorry for the delay, i actually had to go and return to my real life this week and do some work... special thanks to @vagueeyes for being my viewing partner for this one; i actually have very little to add beyond her recaps (here, here, here)! this is only probably interesting if you're interested in how this matinee panned out a little differently... i will post the final_final_final.pdf show recap probably later today or tomorrow 😎

in general, if you are looking for actually intellectual insights or aesthetic imagery, i provide neither of these :))) i would describe myself as the saturday early evening slot - vaguely entertaining, reasonably low-brow, and more like a starter to the actual main event

i'll also take this chance to post my other recaps (❗all contain spoilers, obviously, so if you haven't seen stage/fright, go to bbc iplayer and... oh hang on, this is the wrong fucking script❗) - i didn't actually write up my first watch on 04/03 because i think i was in a state of complete shock where i, much like steve, only saw reece, but here's the rest if u are interested:

episode 2, 08/03 (and my thoughts beforehand)

episode 3, 22/03

episode 4, 28/03

episode 5, 04/04

spoilers for the FINAL STAGE/FRIGHT WYNDHAM'S MATINEE 05/04 below

le general observations

ok so i think most people know that this was the matinee where they had technical issues at the interval and so very excitingly they had to do a slightly different act 2 (more on that later)

anyway, the general vibe of this show was goooood and a good warm-up for the final evening 😊

act i

this was the first time that i noticed how steve looks at reece during their stage/fright intro, where he delivers the line about grief making you "see things that aren't there" and BAM i'm under. i had never noticed this before that they were laying the groundwork for the reece/toby story so early. nicely done pembo oppa i see u

the hostage was louis theroux!! given that i had the insane privilege of seeing sir ian mckellen as the hostage the night before, louis was...... a very different style let's say

louis did himself admit that he "is not a stage actor" and i can confirm that there was no banana eating or audience work a la sir ian. the man is beautifully awkward

he did however perform a snippet of his "viral rap" which was a THRILL (exhibit a, b, c) (@vagueeyes here is the core piece of louis theroux lore that you were missing 😂)

@vagueeyes already did a great job of recalling all louis' references during the sketch

later that weekend louis posted his top 9 of in9 on insta which made me laugh because i hope he's told reece the details of his ranking in minute detail

interval thoughts

ha, well in contrast to my previous interval thoughts, let me tell you there was A LOT more to think about

at first all was normal and then as @vagueeyes and i were seated waiting for act ii to start we were like... hmm... this feels like longer than 20 mins

then the theatre general manager (the man who in a previous episode had said to me "be careful, he'll kill you" when i had used one of the power sockets in the stalls to charge my phone hahah) came to the front with a handheld mic and apologised for the delay and that there were *~technical problems~*

looking at the company stage manager, he said that they didn't expect it to be any longer than 10 mins..... famous last words

ok so another like... 20? mins goes by so we're at like 40 mins now and various members of the crew and front of house look somewhat... perturbed

at this point i'm like oh DAYUM what if i don't get to see my second half! what if i don't get to see hugo!! what if they don't fix it before the evening show, their final show?!

i'm also lol'ing at the image presumably of reece absolutely losing it over (what we had all assumed but not had confirmed at this point) the screen having fucked up. i would have liked to have been a fly on the wall to experience this rage

the GM comes back but this time with david, the associate director for the show who then also comes on over the mic and apologises that they still haven't fixed the issue but they are going to continue with A DIFFERENT SECOND ACT that no one has ever seen before..... and the crowd goes wild

so there's another 10 mins or so before the curtains come up again and awaaaay weeee gooooo. obviously huge cheers ensue

act ii

the second act starts as usual... i wonder how the cast are feeling??

i was way more focused on seeing how hugo/reece absolutely trolls sherrie/miranda and trying to make her break when he first enters... the good morning x3 and the walk is honestly just too ridiculous, and they let that pause after he says good morning hang way longer than they used to

literally not since that ONE show i went to has hugo's song+dance got the applause it deserves??? sighs

SO the first clue of the technical issues is when goudron is describing what happened to his wife and usually there's the projection on the wall behind with a figure being whacked over the head with the shovel... none of that

and so it transpires that yes, the big projection screen that tbh plays a pretty pivotal role in act ii is nowhere to be seen 😱

it does mean that during the rehearsal section we get a lot of new funny content... marcus and vince's lines about it being 'live theatre' get hugeeeee cheers from the audience, so much so that again they do just kinda... stop and let the line hang

already covered in other recaps but then yes, we get to the line about 'bringing the screen down' to which vince is now like 'let's not!!1! they never fucking work anyway', to which again, big lols

reece i think fluffs whatever a new line was meant to be, because him and steve kinda look at each other laughing after that and reece is like, "oh is it my line?" lmao

iirc they still kept most of this script the same tho

when they clear the set to make way for the 'screen'/trepanning scene, steve is still stood on the platform as it starts moving and he stumbles and starts laughing as he nearly falls off the damn thing ahah

the entire section where the screen would be is done without - the warden still has the video cam but your eyes actually have to be on the cast rather than up at the screen now

they still have the section with abby and sherrie and the 'recording' with the camera, but again you don't 'see' what abby sees in the wings. they leant a lot more on using sound cues to make this bit scary

i also noticed that usually abby exits stage right when she goes to 'get frank at stage door', but this time she goes off stage left. i haven't worked out if that was on purpose or not yet

sherrie then still goes backstage w/ the camera, and they still do the dark figure with the bright light, but since we can't see anything it then just skips straight to the head falling. pOW

sooooo interesting how they made all of these changes in the space of the interval and just ran with it!!! kudos to the whole company it was such a fun experience as a viewer!!

i'd be v interested in a first-time viewer's take - i don't think it would have affected the experience too much if you had never seen it before, it was still spooky, but obv as a repeat viewer you realise just how much the screen and projections add to the second act

in some ways i guess it's a shame if that had been your only viewing bc you wouldn't have ever experienced the canon version, but in another way it is again the magic of live theatre that you really do never see the same show twice

in conclusion a bloody good bit of theATrE as vince might say

👻 tl;dr turns out spooky shit happens if you summon bloody belle 86 times!! don't think it's bollocks now do ya???

[starmocha]

omg omg omg omg I'm the pregnant hc anon and I AM SQUEALING CRYING KICKING MY FEET WITH THAT SNOWDROP POST OH MY GOD 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹😍😍😍😍😍😍

that's the cutest thing in the world, just the cutest. their precious baby sleeping between them while they're absolutely giddy. I loved the detail of the ring in your screenshot ♥️ zayne wanting to stay home, not wanting to miss anything aaaaaahhhh this man is everything

he'd really be over the moon, just pure happiness, finding little excuses to check on his son. I guess it's common hc that this green forest of a man, so smart, so knowledgeable, would be so baffled at every tiny little change during the pregnancy and then at every little milestone reached by little snowdrop. just the proudest dad ever. bet he'd shower mc with love, not that he didn't before, but she gave him their son, she carried him, she's the reason zayne can't stop feeling so giddy. 😍😍

i stand with your hc of zayne being so bust he lets his hair grow. i'm a wolf cut truther.

i love your hc for caleb! he'd absolutely have everything ready. he must have dreamed of this his entire life, taking care of mc is second nature to him.

lmao rafa would suffer along, they are bonded, after all. that silly fishie. 💙🩷

my hc for him, one that doesn't leave my head, is that he wouldn't be able to keep his hands off of her, but not in a sexual way (i mean, in a sexual way too but that's for later), like she'd be with him while he'd work on his paintings but he'd spend maybe 10 mins to finish a small detail and he'd ditch work and sit with her on the couch.

he'd make her rest her legs on top if him and massage them all the way down to her feet, he'd rub them and laugh as she'd practically melt into the couch. he'd be very in tune with all of her aches, especially because she'd try to tough it out or hide it. there'd be this day where she'd be working from home (rafayel's place) where he knew she was in pain but she was also cranky and if he told her to rest, it'd only upset her more. but when he sees her stand up and her eyes water and she's leaning forward a bit, and that's when he'd rush to stand behind her, wrap his arms under her baby bump (she's around 7 months here) and he'd gently lift her belly to alleviate the weight and pressure. she'd throw her head back, and let out a small sigh mixed in with a sob. he'd press a kiss to the top of her head and tell her to stay like that for as long as she wanted, he's her personal couch, she can use him as much as she wants.

so they're very in tune with each other, it's like you said, any craving she asks he's ready to make and taste lol

oh oh! sketches! there'd be so many candid sketches of her in his sketch books. so many depicting the various stages of the pregnancy but a lot more of her beautiful face and smile. and so many pictures. polaroids so he can glue them next to the sketches. she's his biggest muse, she's got his entire heart and she's giving him this gift, he couldn't be more mesmerized, more in love with his beloved bride and the little fishie she's carrying.

for xavi, I agree he'd read that book, then another, take notes so he'd be prepared. I have a headcanon that I admit is not the most original now, but since it's been established he glows when he's happy...my mind just goes to this scenario where the pregnancy was truly a happy little accident lmao she knew her period was late, but she didn't think much of it, it's happened before. but the second she felt this overwhelming nausea, she just knew. she requested the day off work, xavi was concerned but thought she was just feeling a little sick. he couldn't miss work so he focused on finishing his mission as soon as possible. he comes back to her with medicine and snacks, saltines mostly. her face's flushed and he thinks she's got a fever. he's going through this thinking she's got the flu. it's only when she asks him to sit because she had something to tell him. then it sinks in that her face's not only flushed, her eyes are puffy, her hands are shaking. but before he can even start to comfort her, she hands three white sticks, says she took those this morning. xavi looks at the sticks in his hands, he knows what they are, he's had countless journeys to the grocery store to buy her pads and tampons and whatever else she needed. he's browsed through that aisle enough times to notice the boxes with those same sticks he's holding right now. "xavier," she calls after he's been quiet for a while. she takes this deep breath and says "I'm--"

"pregnant," he says, cutting her off. "you're...pregnant?"

he's looking at her, just waiting for her answer even though it's obvious. she nods, holding back her tears. this is scary. they haven't discussed this before. he drops his head, staring at the positive pregnancy tests and he just can't help the smile that forms on his face. it's just a genuine, bright smile. the girl he loves more than anything is carrying his baby, god, he's been through so much hell, so much fear---

"you're glowing," she says and he looks at her again. "you're really..."

that's when he moves and brings her into his arms. she buries her head on his chest, repeating her words, a muffled "you're happy?" catches his attention. he says of course he is like it's the most obvious answer. he frowns, a bit concerned, and asks if she doesn't feel the same. she explains she does but because this was all so sudden and they hadn't even talked about this, she got a little scared. and he spends the night reassuring her he couldn't be happier, it's their baby. they make all sorts of plans over the night, his hand never leaves her belly and his glow doesn't fade.

and I'm so glad you liked my sylus! I love the way you portray him. and yeah, I don't see him overreacting even if it's killing him inside. besides there's mephisto and he hadn't alarmed him of anything so at least there was that. he's thr perfect loverboy, healthy communication is important to him and mc. I personally think zaynemc and sylusmc are the most mature ships. I'd say it's because they're older but xavi is really old and he also has his childish moments.

ok, time to shut up again coz I'm just yapping at this point 😂

if it's alright I'll use this emoji 🪷 to identify myself from now on, so it gets easier.

ps: I'm still freaking out over that snowdrop post, it's all I'll think about! I just can't wait for the snowdrop conception fic (I was here to witness the creation of the phrase lol), I know it's gonna be amazing 🩷

-🪷

ABSOLUTELY I'M ALWAYS DELIGHTED TO MEET NEW EMOJI ANONS <333 I'm so happy and honored you enjoy chatting with me 🥺🥺🥺

I literally could not get over how perfect the screencaps look from that perspective + his wolfcut giving the illusion of him unwittingly letting his hair grow out during her last trimester/baby's arrival, so it implies he's more concerned about taking care of others than his own personal appearance. 🥺 I also didn't mention this in the original post, but I imagined baby Snowdrop probably spit up on him or had a messy accident earlier, so after the baby is cleaned up and resting with his mama, Zayne went to shower and that is why he returned to bed shirtless 🙂 I could yap a whole day about new dad Zayne 🤧

I know Caleb would be the best malewife ever 🙂 I don't want to say too much about him, because I do have a fic built around why I think he would be a good father and husband. I've started on it before he was released in January, so.....we'll see if I can get around to tackling that. I think it'll be like 10k+.

omg Raf with the sketches. Why do I also see him being a little shy about her finding them, and he just admits how he's never thought pregnancy could be so beautiful, but perhaps he only thought so now is because this is her, and this is his baby she is carrying. Oh no I'm developing soft feelings for the fishie /lh 🥺

No, but now I am headcanoning so hard that Raf must also have sympathy pains. He's going to suffer with her 🗣️

XAVIER GLOWING ✋ Stop, I'm just picturing her on the couch with him next to her trying to gather her courage to tell him, and since he's already figured out everything, he is sitting there all smiley and flickering like a neon sign lmaooooo

Sylus is my muse <333 Without him, I don't think I would write as much in the fandom as I've done so far, or even write at all. 🥹

LMAO YOU SAW THE GENESIS OF THE PHRASE I'M GONNA CACKLE. I love how the discussions have led to so many silly things :') I was able to complete my first Coral fic, the whole "Snowdrop conception fic" agenda........ thank you everyone for planting seeds in my head. I'm losing my mind because of all of you <33333333

[blobmanwhotries]

I wanted to reblog the og post and add the speedpaint there but ig Tumblr doesn't let you do that

It's here instead now ig, for those who want to watch (3 min.)

Notes, ramble, and fanfic updates under the cut

Video time: 3 minutes.

Total time: ~5 hours, 17 minutes.

App: IbisPaintX (ugly ass water mark in the corner).

Device/Tool: My phone and finger.

-

I like this speedpaint a lot. You can see how I improve and change things throughout the piece. I wish you could see just how much I use that undo button though - that button is my savior.

The starting sketch DOES belong to me. I want to make that abundantly clear (I use a lot of outside references sometimes). If I use an outside reference and it is in the final product (as in I use other art as reference), I will give credit if I can. The reaper picture next to it is not mine and belongs to the Subnautica devs.

-

Process (kinda):

1) Using a sketch makes this SO MUCH EASIER. It's a pain in the ass but jfc it's faster than trying to digitally sketch with your finger

2) Blah blah blah rough outline whatever

3) I swear I know how to use the paint bucket tool yall, that would've made shit so much easier, but there were gaps and i couldn't figure out where they were so my background kept turning fucking blue

4) SO PROUD OF THE BLUE TO RED FADE MARKINGS ON THE ARMS. I USED THE ERASER TOOL FOR THAT.

5) Realized the blue was too bright and i need to tone it down - tried to keep it from looking like the blue water was making him (the character) blue

6) i cant remember when the reaper reference is added it just lowkey appears

7) i wasn't trying to shade but i kinda did with the way i outlined some of his torso

8) color gradient for texture

9) scars. Tried to add more texture to the scars by adding color but i hated it.

face: his dad

(right) arm: small fish (biter? bleeder? unsure)

(right) axillary zone: prolly another reaper

(left) hip area: small fish (unsure)

front of the pelvis (kinda): scratch (prolly a claw)

(right) lower than hip zone: small fish (unsure)

10) at some point i added texture to the dorsal fin???

11) adjusting the face

12) turn off the lineart layer

13) While working on the lighting and shading (that wack white box and purple shit? yeah) I realized that I'm gonna need help figuring it out - I got on the floor behind one of the couches in my living room and tried mimicking the pose and realized that the anatomy was all fucked up and I had to fix it 💀💀💀

14) properly work on shading (kinda, still looks wack)

15) blend that shit (lowkey liked it better before) but thats fine

And there we go, you got urself a reaper Jeremy

-

I plan on working on Viktor next - might do chris first tho. I'm not sure yet. I still have other things to draw (and write, for that matter).

I'm currently working on getting a lot of my lore straightened out. I'm also trying to make character sheets for me to reference and use to write headcanon drabbles n whatnot. The world-buliding is genuinely crazy -

I mean, I made three OCs just so I could build up Chris' experience in the mafia, and that's not including Jubi. There's about 20 characters I have to write things for, and that's not taking the missing children (which is ALSO about 20) into consideration. I also have other AUs which really messes with the timeline.

All in all, I've been slowly working on more stuff to post in my oneshot book. Since I've thought about him the most, Scott's almost done. I believe Viktor will be done soon too.

-

Anywho, if you've made it to the end lf this, thanks. I like being able to post random thoughts and ideas I have, even if I know not everyone will read or engage with it.

As always, ask box is open - feel free to drop a note or smth in there. Have a fantastic day/night.

[tewwor]

CHARACTER STUDY — HARUO & ART MANIPULATION ( ABILITIES / CT )

OVERVIEW .

User is able to manipulate existing / newly created art of various forms. Haruo is only able to shape and bring life to traditional art that revolve around drawings and paintings. The realism of which his creations depends on how detailed Haruo is able to construct it — which is defaulted to a very high probability seeing as most of his existing skill revolves around hyperrealism.

DETAILS .

Is able to bring art created by others to life but the duration / effectiveness is halved.

Materials can impact results by means of texture and even durability, i.e., charcoal will have an almost gritty texture vs. graphite will be far smoother.

Colors also impact results by way of personality and additional stats. Red — higher aggression & attack. Blue — slower, but with higher defense. Yellow — additional agility. Haruo is able to finetune certain attributes based off of the primary colors if he mixes it by hand, i.e. a more redish purple vs. more blueish purple.

Carries all sorts of writing utensils on him from charcoal pencils, all manners of graphite, permanent markers, posca markers, etc.

Fun fact: He can use blood as a medium, but ... Gets queasy because he's a normal man with normal reactions. He can also draw on any surface and pull the drawing free from it — including himself.

J.JK SPECIFIC .

Binding vow — Warmup : Varies between 10 seconds, 1 min, and 5 min sketches. The less time used, the more cursed energy is imbued into the sketch ( won't be as detailed as the 5 min sketch but it'll pack more of a punch ). The longer and more detailed a sketch is, the more multifaceted it can act ( fight like fully rendered person with all limbs & proper reaction time vs. an anatomical skeleton outline that just barrels into things for sheer impact ).

Binding vow — Critique : Optimal usage is when combined when Revealing One's Hand. Haruo stages an impromptu critique of what is intended to be used & for what purpose to double the already increased cursed energy output given by Revealing One's Hand. Haruo is only able to do this with others & not himself.

[jabesa0]

Hii I amabsoloutly inlove eith your artstyle.

can I ask a few questions? :<

how lomg does your deawings usually take? and do you have any speedpaints,,, uploaded somewbere... for studying purposes

your drawings makr me want to to back to lineless art lol. and not take it so hard on myself.....

Hi there!! Unfortunately I don’t have any speedpaints seeing as I stop drawing while I’m working on my stuff cuz I get distracted easily 😭😭 so if I did you’d just have big periods where nothings happening LOL usually I post process shots on my personal irl server after each drawing session just so I can see how far along I am but that’s about it!

Also I fully support lineless!! I don’t do any lineart (clearly LOL) and it’s more fun to just paint over your sketch and make as you go!! And yeah don’t be so hard on yourself anon! Art is hard and shit takes time, so whether you take a few days on a piece or months I think you should be proud that you actually made something, even if it’s just for yourself :)!!

As for the question of how long I take on my drawings:

(More under the cut!)

As for how long it takes me to make drawings, I’d say it varies like this purple mammon I recently posted took a month but that’s because I had lots of final school work to do and I got sick twice during that time 💀💀 but this three pose page I did as a commission:

This one took me 9 days which is crazy when I think abt it actually cause there’s way more happening but yeah!!

This mammon in the back dress as well took about five days!! So to give you an estimate I’d say anywhere from 1 to 4 weeks? Most mammons I do usually end up being on the lower half of that range! Outside circumstances may make it vary but that’s usually the time it takes!!

Oh and I’d like to add that I usually am a night owl and only start working till around the evening times when I draw!! So when I say days I don’t mean like I spend d all day over my tablet, I don’t think that’d be very good for your health anyways 🤕🤕 take breaks yall play a game you like or watch something on YouTube!!! Don’t spend all your time working lest you burn out!!

I’m gonna be real with all of you, cause my friends make fun of me for it ALL THE TIME LOL but the largest majority of mammon drawing time is like 80% redrawing the face over and over and 20% the rest give or take. I drive myself crazy drawing mammon faces cause I need it to be perfect cause it’s mammon so when it’s not “perfect” I keep working at it and I don’t move on until it is 💀💀 my friends notice a cycle where it’s like:

“You guys I have such a fire idea for a mammon drawing” (makes sketch and flats in like 10 mins) —> (starts face) “wait you guys this face is kinda good maybe I won’t spend fifty years on it :D” —> “eehhhhhhgh okay face not looking good lemme see if I can tweak it” —> “okay face need to be redone.” —> “I decided against redoing it I’m just gonna fix what I have” —> “we gotta throw the whole idea out and start again.” —> “wait you guys I think I did it the face looks good asf was I crying for nothing before??” (They tell me yes I always do) —> (I move on from the face) —> (the rest is completed within 2-4 days) —> Done!

It’s stupid as hell I know LOL but when it comes to mammon if i don’t make him as best as I can I don’t feel like I do him justice. The things we do for love, right?

[asrisgratitudejournal]

Upset, tired, lack of sleep, hormone imbalance

Written 21.03 from my bed after having quite good long sleep (5 hours) during the day (11am–2pm-ish? and 6–8pm-ish), in the middle of quite long to-do list (I need to read reports and watch videos for tomorrow I will be grading students’ big assignments).

All in all, the last few days have been a blast(?) I could say I had 80% fun, and 20% shits but the shits has just ruined the fun… Ke lapangan lagi(!!!) setelah sekian lama!!! My last field trips were 10 days of Dorset back in 2023? Was demonstrating with Stuart back then. And also 1 day trip to St Audrey Bay with the team. So I was super-duper excited (I used to hate field work SO MUCH because it was so exhausting and hot and confusing and I always wanted to cry every time, but now that I don’t need to walk a long way and I LITERALLY have different, more evolved, brain and skillset (I bring my mini watercolour set with me!), I kinda looked forward to this trip). To add, this is a place I have never been so the outcrops and rocks will be new to me. Dan benar saja. For most of the time, I really enjoyed my time: taking the train(!), making sketches of outrcrops, thinking (THINKING. ABOUT ROCKS. IN OUTCROP. Betul-betul rare occasion karena selama 4.5 tahun terakhir I ONLY look at POWDERED ROCKS), answering ‘cute’ questions from these students (I LOVE BEING ASKED so much, even though most of the time I wouldn’t be able to give clear-cut answers, what I love is that I forced myself so much to think because I don’t want to disappoint these students by saying ‘I don’t know’…), interacting with the assistants, learning A. LOT. from one of more senior lecturers from UGM (Pak Indra Novian) with years of experiences in the field, interacting with Ibu Katering (makanannya enak di sini), getting change of sceneries of sawah and mountains and kambing climbing steep rock wall, passing by kandang sapi, melihat orang jemur gabah, JAJAN POP. ICE., I just love it. These past 5 days have also made me think a lot why I wanted to do geology in the first place, and kinda find the answer: I LOVE puzzles and geology mapping is literally finding puzzle pieces and trying to fit them together to make a nice logical history of the earth.

Intinya happy.

Tapi… ya emang namanya manusia. Even in the peak of euphoria and enlightenment I am experiencing, there’s gotta be something that ruins it. I know I shouldn’t be logical about this: ya kalau sedih dan mood swing dirasain aja gausah di-over-analyse, but I can’t help to think “WHY”: kenapa ya sedih, kenapa ya capek banget, pusing, mood swing, SUPER mudah irritated and annoyed, LAPER terus. Jawabannya adalah kombinasi dari: kurang tidur, BANGET, kayanya 3 malam terakhir tuh baru bisa tidur jam setengah 2, jam 2, stengah 3, dan udah kebangun jam setengah 6. Ada hubungannya juga sepertinya dengan kamarku yang BERISIK banget dekat dengan pompa air di belakang, ngopi malem-malem, dan kasur yang keras, terlalu excited sama kembali ke lapangan, ada rasa was-was juga karena I LITERALLY was in charge of these kids, dan recently baru ketahuan dari app kalau emang lagi PMS aja, in 2–3 days jadwalnya akan mens jadi hormonnya lagi superchaotic.

Udah, nah dari situ, makin ketrigger lagi aku dari kebodohan-kebodohan sederhana yang lumayan bikin malu kayak these students not being punctual: ‘ketemu di singkapan ini lagi 1320 ya setelah makan dan solat’ terus literally jam 1320 BELUM JALAN KE SINGKAPAN?? It took about 2-3 mins sih emang, tapi ya berarti kalau 1320 UDAH ketemu di singkapan harusnya udah jalan dari 1317??? Sampe sekarang masih nggak tahu salahnya siapa… I will just put the blame in their parents (and maybe COVID).

Dari 1 event itu, my future flashes upon me: SHIT, I will have to deal with these kids for AT LEAST in the next 2 years in my life (if I decide to stay in UI, looks like I am not leaving soon tbh). Terus yaudah ada part aku projectingnya juga: “I root for them so much, I really want them to be successful. Kalau bisa, way better than me. And even for me it took SO MUCH discipline and punctuality to arrive at this point, so I really want them to be discipline and punctual, I want them to be me.” This thinking point was exactly where things started to get ugly. I started to treat them like I treated my (past) self. Just being SO HARD and mean and… just not nice. This was actually where I should’ve tried to step out a bit and detach. And I didn’t. And it’s okay, I’m not blaming you, 3-day-ago-Noni, really, I understand you did it out of kindness, out of care, because you’re just too nice and too good for this world. And I love you, I love me for that. YAH NANGIS DEH ini sambil nulis ini. HUFT.

Tapi yaudah… akhirnya dia (saya) capek sendiri. For nothing. And just like that, this whole psychological projection has just ruined the 80% fun.

I know I will look at this post tomorrow or the day after tomorrow thinking “jujur ngomong apa Non it was never that deep you’re just tired” (LIHAT bahkan aku sudah ngejudge my current self using the POV of my future self like WTF is wrong with me???). Ok, skip.

But yes this is real, this is happening, this is valid, this is what I’m currently thinking and feeling right now. Did writing all this help sort the feelings out? Not really… Maybe…? We’ll see. Tujuan nulis ini juga gaktau apa tapi emang pengen nulis aja biar unek-uneknya keluar and I just feel like I need to put all these mixed emotions into words because to be honest, I don’t know what I’m (and was) currently feeling: am I sad? Am I just overwhelmed? (I have 10 things to do and MPG kemarin bikin aku harus hold kerjaan banyak banget). Is this because I feel lonely? (5 hari kemarin ngerasa gabisa share emotional load ke orang lain karena jadi the only “adult” in the room). Am I just exhausted physically, and it affected my emotion? Kayak WTF is this what is going on??? (Tapi kalau boleh jujur, I’m a bit familiar with this feeling sih, kaya tiap 2 atau 3 bulan sekali emang PMS-nya bakal ada versi yang DEPRESSED banget kaya gini sampe nangis sendiri malem-malem, walaupun ada juga yang gak kerasa samsek happy-happy aja eh tiba-tiba mens – I’ll check with doctor soon, harus minum obatkah dia?).

Tapi yaudah itu aja yang mau disampaikan, tidak ada kesimpulan tapi minimal udah keluar jadi words. Semoga besok lebih baik. Amin.

Sun 27 April 2025; 21.55 kamar kemuning